I was diagnostic with anxiety trouble around April 2018. This was diagnostic by my Familly doctor after a month of medical leave from my job. I suffer from anxiety since the 2017 summer. From summer 2017 to April 2018, I didn’t know it was Anxiety. There
Definition of generalized anxiety disorder
We will start by defining what is the generalized anxiety disorder so everyone will on the same page. Using this definition, we will not be confused by an other definition.
The Canadian Mental Health Association describe it as :
Generalized anxiety disorder is excessive worry around a number of everyday problems for more than six months. This anxiety is often far greater than expected—for example, intense anxiety over a minor concern. Many people experience physical symptoms too, including muscle tension and sleep problems.
Living with anxiety problems
Within knowing it, I had multiple effects of anxiety on my body. I had some vision trouble, head hurt, I was going to throw up at any moment. Also, I had multiple weakness moments when I was getting up from a chair. I was tired as never and I was hypervigilant about anything. At this moment, I had a 2-year-old kid at that moment, one baby in the oven. I also had a full-time job, I did a trip to Disney. I was not even sure if I was happy or if I was angry all the time.
At any moment, my emotion was going to “happy” to anxious with a little bit of aggressivity like punching something. It could be the wall or the steering of my car. I was punching the steering for a small reason like there is light traffic while going to see Disney On Ice show. It should be a happy event,
The diagnostic of the anxiety trouble
My doctor was not sure if I was in depression or it was anxiety but after a month of medical leave and with pills that I take only when needed, I was going way better and started working again at my job. This doctor also said that if I had
I saw a psychologist while I was in medical leave and it helped a bit but not that much. I already know that I had to change my perception at my job of the request I was getting. At my job, I am dealing with hard content on a daily base and I had a lot of work ticket to answer without having the tools to do it. It was looking like the job was not done well. So I took it too personally. The hypervigilant and the anxiety from having nothing done came from there.
But, this was not the only problems, I had also trouble with my In-Law so nothing was on my side to bring the anxiety down. I learned to let some things go in these areas of my life and it got better. But I still have days that I am struggling to get over it and thanks to the pills they help for these days.
Am I crazy now ?
Not even a bit, mental health is something that should be like saying I have cancer, asthma, wart … But for some person, you are crazy, you can’t manage yourself and it’s not normal. With the society where you need to perform in every area of your life, mental health is something near us all the time. Almost everyone knows someone with some mental health problem so if someone
My financial life while having uncontrolled anxiety
When my anxiety was uncontrolled, I had some uncontrolled spending. That was one of the effects of my anxiety. I didn’t care about anything and getting in consumer debt. So I’ve spen way too much on coffee, domains names and eating out. I can say I’m still living with these debts, so they are huge and I pay interest on my credit card and my credit score got down a lot.
Once my anxiety got at a low level, I saw these spending and said to my self, god am I stupid or what? These spending at the moment was making me feel better but it was for an hour to a couple max. I was to the point that I was eating my lunch at my job and go to the nearest Tim Horton get a cookie and a large Double-Double coffee. They are some small amount but it was three to four times a day of coffee and take out so at the end of the day it was around $20 to $30.
Also, while having these, I missed a lot of days at my job. I got to the point that I was not even doing a full week of four days in a month and more. That was the thing that hurt my finance the more. I didn’t know what I had so I was using my prepaid sick leave and used my family days for it … So I was not getting any cash these days and I was missing around $170 per day … After my medical leave, I was paid 80% of my salary when I missed for sick leave so it was not a 100% salary lost but still, 20% missed for the budget.
The after diagnostics on my finance
Now I am trying to pay back these credit card. I feel that I am in the right direction for it these days but it can be hard when I have some bad day with a high level of anxiety. the urge to buy coffee, fast food or domains is coming back.
My financial trouble didn’t create any more anxiety, it seems to be related to my family life and my job.
So the effects of anxiety on my finance are still present in my day to day finance with these credit card debt. I’ve got some low-interest card and some high one. So I am planning to pay the high one first and the others after.
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